Wait, I already am

So now I have turned invisible. So much for that then, whatever it was. I know it’s all for the best, because that can of worms is not one I care to open again. But I can’t say that it would not feel bad.

And I would very much like to know what it was that went wrong in that 5 minutes that we spent in the same room. Because to me it seems that something did. I know I most likely acted funny, but how would he know what is normal for me and what is not. Or was I that obvious…

But the fact remains that he at least used to say hi when we passed by. Now I’m just air. Just yesterday I happened to end up in a dentist’s waiting room at the same time. No other co-workers present, barely even any other people there and he did not acknowledge my presence in any way. I do not exist anymore.

So now I’m pretty sure he will not even show up on Friday. This is also a good thing, as alcohol changes things and I’m still afraid I would do something stupid. But then I know that the evening is just going to be incredibly boring and most likely I will just go home early. Bah, I do not even feel like going. But it would seem incredibly funny if I did not go because I’m the one who has been sending out the invitation emails…

So I’ll go. But I will be prepared to go home early if things suck as they usually do at these parties. Damn, I wish it was Saturday already and this was over. Once again I wish that you could fast forward your life. Why not skip a few years at once to a (hopefully) happier place in my life!


3 responses to “Wait, I already am

  1. Hey, have you ever thought that maybe his behavior has nothing to do with you?

    Besides, if he can’t see the kind of person you are, screw him! you don’t need his approval to be a great woman!

  2. I’m not letting this get me down too much. Life goes on and I’m sure there is a new surprise waiting for me somewhere. As always it’s most likely just that I’m overanalyzing everything…

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